I had good intentions.
I was at DragonCon. I had my laptop. I had wireless (after I paid the $10.00 for twenty-four hours at the Sheraton). I had my schedule highlighted and color coded. I was going to do lots and blog the heck out of it.
Of course, none of that happened.
Day 1 . . . well, I don’t really remember everything I did. There was that Babylon 5 panel I had planned on going to, but it got booted because of the Shatner/Nimoy thing. From there, things sort of just took on their own strange existence. All the color coding blended into one . . . blended color. There was so much to do and so little time to do it. Should I try to do it all in one big miserable, marathon of a time? I could have, and in years past I would have. But that was then. So, that’s when the revelation arrived. Echoed in my mind was that famous line you always hear somewhere during your educational experience: “the unexamined life is not worth living.” DragonCon 2009 proved to be, for me, the kind of situation one needs to jog the flotsam and jetsam of the mind.
So, I did some reflecting.
This was my umpteenth time at DragonCon. This year, however, I was carrying around forty plus years and a five year old. Things were different. Not worse. Different.
During previous years, I did the dashes from panel to panel, wandered the walk of fame, fought through the dealers’ room, danced around the exhibiters’ hall, and strolled throughout the art room. I used to do it all in those four days. I was a fan of action.
Well, I’m still a fan. I’m still active. I’m just more careful with my time. This year, I learned that the time I was willing to devote to my fannish activities was not the same as in days of yore. I remember hitting the walk of fame with a fist-full-o-cash and stopping by the table of anyone I recognized from a TV show or film from my youth. Not this year. Sure, there were found memories as I walked around, but there was only one I stopped to get: Bruce Boxleitner. Why? Babylon 5 entertained me, it moved me, it made me think. I was willing to invest the time and money because of everything Mr. Boxleitner had given me with his contribution to my favorite TV show of all time. Oh, don’t fret, I know Peter, Claudia, Tracy, and Stephen were there – I got them several DC’s ago. This was Boxleitner’s first visit. Maybe his last. I couldn’t pass it up.
The same went for Mr. Patrick Stewart. I stood in line a good hour and a half. Willingly. Five or six years ago, I would have done the same thing for Shatner and Nimoy, even though I really don’t care for the original Trek. They are icons, and their contribution to science fiction is immeasurable. But now, I had something else to do. I almost went into hypothermia jumping into the pool with my little girl. I quickly climbed out, but sat and watched her have a good time. At that moment in all of history, that was what was important to me.
When Mr. Stewart spoke, my cousin Steph waited two or three hours to get in the hall. I passed. I would have liked to have been there, but I new I could watch it on closed circuit TV. Anyway, I wanted to get in line for Gene Wolfe. His signing began just as Stewart was finishing. Mr. Wolfe is one of the greats. I expected a huge line and was willing to wait. I got there an hour early and was probably the tenth one there. Steph stopped by to check on me after Mr. Stewart’s panel, by the way. When I looked at the line there was maybe forty people, so yeah, I could have gone. No, I don’t have any regrets.
I also struggled to stay awake to check out Abney Park Friday night (Saturday morning actually). Fantastic! They are such an awesome live band. Better, I think, live than recorded – which to me, is the sign of a great band. Anyway, the next morning, there was something I had colored in on the grid, but when I woke up snuggled up to the misses and the little one, well, it doesn’t get much better than that. We had breakfast and back to the pool we went.
So, what’s the point, you ask?
Well, it came down to an either or for me: I could have either done it all (and blogged) or I could have just enjoyed the moment. I enjoyed the moment.
You know what? I can’t wait to go back. I’m sure it will be different still, but watching my daughter discover the wonders of fandom is worth lots more than any autograph or panel. Besides, the whole idea of conventions was to bring the like-minded together. You still get that at a lot of the little cons, and I’m sure it’s true to some extent at DragonCon, but anymore DC, to me, feels more like a commercial event. I’m not saying I don’t like it. I will go back, but when I go back, I will be enjoying it in my on way, on my own terms, and on my own time.